It's Ruba from Gaza

Today is November 22 which marks day 46 of the war. The title of this post sounds sad, and I have to warn you that it is. For the last couple of days in Rafah, the drones, also known in Gaza as the zanana have been flying over our heads. The sound is so close that it feels like they’ll end up in your lap. Finally yesterday I started to feel a little positive about the news that a truce will start soon. I started thinking about every corner of my home and how damaged it could be and what I can do about it. Last night before I went to sleep I had finalized the plan in my head. I would have to wait for a couple of hours so that the drivers on the road could let us know which roads to use. My 79-year-old father cannot climb up the piles of sand blocking the road and we need to take that into account. My brother is young and if we come across any soldiers we should be able to protect him.  The doorman who looks after our building has not been responding to phone calls and messages and w...

I have no idea how this past year has already ended. How did Christmas time pass and the new year start without me even realizing? This was always my favorite time of year. Every year I celebrated Christmas and this year I didn’t even know it was Christmas. I used to celebrate it with my family and we’d also celebrate the new year together. Sometimes when my father was very busy at his shop I’d celebrate it with neighbors and friends from my building. It was always a very beautiful time of year.  So again, I don’t know how it came and went without me even noticing. All we have been thinking about is finding our relatives who were missing. We finally got the good news that my 90-year-old aunt was found. She’s my aunt from my father’s side like I wrote before - she lost two grandchildren - one was her son’s child and the other was her daughter’s.  We finally found out where she was after calling everyone we possibly could. There was hardly any communication at the time but event...

Today is the 21st of December and this blog is going to be a hard one to read. I am warning you now that if you cannot listen to shocking, terrifying and disgusting details then this blog is not for you. Living through this war is like living through a horror movie and you will see why when you read these stories. Of course, nothing  is more dramatic and sad than being forced to flee your home, to move from one place to another and to end up being displaced. For me I came immediately to Rafah because I knew people here but that's not the case for everyone. There are people who left from Gaza City to Deir El Balah to a school, and then to Khan Younis and then to Rafah so they have had to flee 4 or 5 times. This war has made us be away from our homes for over two months now, forcing another family to host us, and there are others living in schools or in the streets or in tents. There’s nothing worse than not knowing where your relatives are or what they’re doing or even losing them -...

Today is the 25th of February and another month has just flown by. Here in Gaza we don’t realize that time is passing us by as things here continue to be the same, and then suddenly we look at the date and get a shock. The clock is still ticking for me and I continue to fight for my right to leave as soon as possible. I’ve done everything I possibly can in order to leave and now I’m leaving it to God, or in the hands of destiny or whatever you want to call it. I’m doing this because I’ve done all the formal procedures and everything within my capacity that I could do. I don’t know what to expect now - there are always delays and we are just waiting. We could be told we can leave at any moment. Meanwhile things are still happening here in Gaza.  The other day I went to visit my sister who now lives in a kindergarten. While I was there I learned that the Israelis had taken her neighbour’s son. I was sitting with my sister and someone outside was calling her in a trembling voice, unab...

Today is the 30th of January and one month of this year has already passed. One out of twelve. Sometimes I wonder if we are going to spend additional years counting down the days of this war. It’s not easy for me to tell the stories in this blog for two reasons: firstly reliving them is double the heartbreak, and secondly I recently made a decision to try and make the most of every moment and to try and be positive whatever the situation is. I did this for a couple of days but then the reality hit me, as if it was giving me a message that I shouldn’t go too far away from it.  I had been praying that it wouldn't rain this winter, because of all the displaced people living in tents. But when I heard that it was going to rain, I decided that I was going to try and enjoy it, and so I went for a walk that morning - something that I had been doing for a long time before the war and I miss it. After a very nice walk in which I finally felt the cold breeze on a rainy day on my face, I deci...

Today is the 21st of November and it’s Day 46 of the war. Since it started we have heard different types of weapons and bombs once, twice, thrice, four, five, six, ten, eleven or one hundred times a day. On some days we only hear one or two types of weapons but these have a much stronger impact than the other types which we hear more often.  In spite of this people continue to live their daily lives in Gaza. They wake up hearing the sound of bombs but they also wake up with the same thoughts that any normal person would have on their mind – things like ‘How are we going to get milk for our babies? How are we going to cook for our children? How are we going to make sure they have at least one proper meal today?’ If they manage to secure their basic needs then there is a sense of relief. This is what I want to discuss in my blog today.  Empty shelves in the supermarket in Rafah Even before discussing how we get our basic services I want to explain what I mean by basic services o...